Sometimes you're the windshield; sometimes you're the bug

Is there anyone that has gone through life without encountering the dreaded bully? Most likely not, but if so - feel free to comment about it (or anything).

Unfortunately, Micah encountered some bullying last week during recess. At least that is my motherly opinion. (I have gotten other opinions that what occurred could not be classified as bullying.) Micah likes to play basketball at recess and there is only one goal. Unfortunately another 3rd grader that enjoys playing basketball, does not like for Micah to join in. Therefore he has told Micah that he cannot play. A few times. It has hurt my boy's feelings.

And yet, I can't understand it. In my 35 year old mind I wonder, 'why does he listen to this kid?' However, my 9 year old mind probably would have not been so bold. He most likely inherited his meekness from me. (Don't laugh! I AM meek.)

Later, on Sunday night, Chase complained to me about his back hurting. Apparently one of his friends at church knocked him down. Oh yeah, after choking him. Last week this friend made bruises on Chase's arm. The thing is, this kid genuinely likes Chase. I think he's just a roughhouser. But Chase complained and whined about how much his friend hurt him.

I suppose I just sort of snapped. I asked him why he put up with it if it hurt so much. I said, "If it were me, I would tell him, 'Friend, either take your hands off of me or I will knock your lights out.' And then, if he didn't take his hands off of me, I would knock his lights out." Chase giggled, but Micah was appalled: "At CHURCH?!?" he asked. (Parental disclaimer: I don't really think Chase has this in him. Furthermore, Paul told me it was really bad advice.)

But I didn't stop there. "And, Micah! Why on earth do you let other kids tell you what you can and can't do? If I wanted to play basketball and some kid said I can't, I would ask him, 'who made you the boss of the basketball court?' And I'd play anyway!" Like I said, there was a definite snapping point. Micah liked it, though. He and Chase thought Mommy was being extra funny. The Big, Bad Mommy. I guess they've heard 8 or 9 years of "Play nice" and "be respectful" and "Staggs' aren't rude." So this was kind of a shock.

Anyway, hopefully it worked. Micah reported that he played basketball today, even after the "bully" said he couldn't. Eventually, the other kids just included him on their team. He was nicer about it, though. He said when the other kid told him to move somewhere else, Micah's answer was, "No, thanks." I like that. Polite but firm. That's my boy.

Who knows what the future of recess brings? And for that matter if my friend from church will wonder why I suggested that my son knock her son's lights out.