The Enabling Mommy

This past Tuesday evening, Micah was measuring with meters, centimeters and decimeters for math homework.When he had completed it, he handed it to me to look over - as is our custom. Sadly, I must admit I have no idea how to measure in anything other than inches, feet and (sometimes) yards. (Drat that confounded metric system! Doesn't it know to stay out of the U.S.?) Anyway, I asked Paul to help and together we were able to check over Micah's homework.

It was time to set the table for supper and I didn't want Micah's homework to get gloppy so I put it away in his bookbag (let the ominous background music start now).

Wednesday, Micah brought home a note from his teacher saying that his homework was not turned in, nor any of the other various folders for which he is responsible and that he would not be able to participate in recess until all is turned in. When I asked Micah why he did not turn in his requirements he answered that he could not find them. They were not in his bookbag.

Well! I knew differently! I did not leave that job to my (perfectly capable) son. No sir, I placed it in his bookbag, myself. So after Micah and I searched the house high and low, and the car, I sent off an email to his teacher stating that I had put his homework in his bag and I am sure it made it to school and could she please have Micah check everywhere at school, again?

Thursday morning came around and Micah's teacher replied to my email. Micah had checked all around and had not located his missing items. I searched the house (again), then went to school. Now, before you lecture me on being too intrusive, Thursday happens to be the day I regularly volunteer at the school. So I was going anyway.

I checked the office and the lost and found (with no luck) before heading to Micah's classroom. Lo and behold, there on the shelf above the bookbags out in the hallway are all of Micah's missing items - plain as day. I showed Micah's teacher - who was bewildered. She said Micah had looked around for two days without finding his items. We decided that we should give him another chance to find his things and left everything lying where it was. At that point, his teacher asked if I regularly packed his bookbag. "Er, uh, I mean . . ."

OK. Point taken. I THOUGHT I was helping my kids out, but truth be told, I am teaching them to be dependent on me. Well, no more! We are going to be one mighty independent and organized household.

Boy, it's hard, though. This morning (Friday), I saw his homework lying on the bench in the mudroom before we walked out for school. I fought every urge to place it in his bag. I watched him pick up his bag and go outside without his homework (man, it physically hurt to watch that). I will admit, I told Micah to check the mudroom before we drove away. Paul says I should have said nothing. I think he's right - it's as hard a lesson for me as it is for Micah.

I have to add this, though. As I'm writing, Paul and Micah just came home from his basketball practice. Paul reports that Micah walked out of the house without his coat, basketball or dribbling report. Yup, we've a long road ahead of us.